This week was another round of labs and doctor visits for me, which also meant another round of bruises left behind from the needles. I seriously bruise like a peach! I'm okay with these little remnants of my time in the lab though, because I know how important the results are to my health. Yesterday was my meeting with Dr. Thomas. The first thing we discussed was my TSH, which determines whether or not my current dosage of my thyroid medication is working properly. Because I was diagnosed as Stage I with a lower risk of recurrence, my results this time around of 0.4 was a great number. Patients who are not free of disease or who have a higher chance of the cancer returning usually need to be suppressed to a lower level than that. He is also hesitant to try and suppress my levels any more because of the heart palpitations I have been having. So, I'll keep on truckin' at 100 mcg!
Another very important test that they did was on my thyroglobulin (try saying that 3 times fast), otherwise known as the tumor marker. The results on this one help us to see if there might be any cancer trying to return. Ideally, the thyroglobulin levels should be as low as possible (close to zero) because I should have no cancerous cells left. This time around, mine was less than 0.1, or barely detectable. As my doctor monitors me over time, those levels should remain constant. If there is an increase, that is a signal that the cancer is recurring.
While my physical health has been pretty great lately, I have noticed some new patterns in my moods and in the way I handle stress. I have noticed an increase in feelings of anxiety and my emotions have been on a bit of a roller coaster lately. I talked with Dr. Thomas about these symptoms to try and get to the bottom of what is going on. There are a few things that might be happening. One possibility is my medication still trying to regulate all of the hormones and balance everything out. Another is just more stress than usual combined with the fact that it's winter. Or, it could be that (even though I may not voice it out loud) there is still a fear in the back of my mind about my cancer and the potential of it returning. He said that this last one is fairly common within the first year or two of a diagnosis too. All of this is really good to know because I was starting to feel a little crazy.
What I'm learning through this process is that, for the most part, I just go about my daily life and don't give cancer a second thought. Everything is normal. I feel generally healthy and happy. Life goes on. And then there are weeks like this one that lead up to those lab results. Weeks when I let the fear and worry about my health get the best of my emotions and I just can't deal with it all. If you're around me during those days and I start to act unlike my normal self, would you do me a favor? Just smile and tell me everything is going to be fine.
